Sunday, September 14, 2008

Chad Ocho-Cinco: Hello Money! Goodbye Soul

I am all for drawing attention to yourself. I have spent a good part of my 36 years on this earth acting like a goofball, and some of these times I was actually intending it. However for all the self promotion and craziness that I aspire to reach, I draw the line at changing who I am for money. This is perhaps why I am more than irritated by NFL wide receiver Chad Johnson's recent attempt to make himself bigger than the game he claims to play for the love of it by legally changing his name to "Chad Ocho-Cinco."
Let's examine the facts:
1) His jersey number is 85 and in Spanish that is "ocho-cinco" (at least i think it is, i don't remember much of the Spanish classes i took so long ago)
2) Chad Johnson is not (to the best of my knowledge) Spanish, Mexican or any other group that speaks Spanish as it's primary language. Nor does it seem to be a tribute to his heritage.

Apparently, the only reasons he would have changed his name are
1) He wants to be more 'worldly' by reaching out to Spanish speakers.
2)He forgets his number a lot and "chad eighty-five" was taken,
3) some company who he endorses paid him A LOT of money to eliminate his family name to make money by being a news story for a few days. After all if Prince and Puff Daddy can make news by changing their names, why cant overrated football players from sub-par teams?

Based on these conclusions, the former "Chad Johnson" is either a huge idiot or a huge sellout. I would tend to believe it's the later, although Id rather be the idiot. After all, Ive been doing that for years, and I didn't have to buy all my old jerseys either.

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